Very bad habit

Before I start talking about my very gross habit - the only one I'm really not sure I'll be able to replace with the habit of not doing it - I'm very pleased to announce that I posted my ebay items. It all makes me a tad nervous, but mainly just proud that I finished that item on my projects list.

Anyway, I've talked about daily habits and weekly habits, but how about an every-five-minutes-habit that will likely take me weeks to shake / replace with a new habit? How about I have no idea what I'll replace this gross habit with?

I'm talking about picking at the skin around my nails. I just can't stop; it's a near-constant nervous habit. I don't bite or pick at the nails, mind you, just the skin. It is all torn up, you guys. To the point that even manicurists are like, omg gross when they see it. 

In the past, I've tried battling this with keeping my actual nails very pretty and polished. They look so nice that I want to look at them rather than pick at the skin surrounding them. This has never worked longterm, however, because the upkeep is not a good habit of mine, plus my work requires them to be chip-free if polished, yet the work itself makes it almost impossible to keep them in that state. 

I think in this case I just have to bite the bullet and be determined to keep them pretty and polished, even if that means nightly care to keep them nice for work. It's the only thing that's worked in the past, and experience has shown that the only flaw was my own laziness, so that's what I can correct. Right? Right. Maybe just working on my nails can be what replaces picking the skin as a habit.

In short, "manicure" is going on my daily to-do list. Right after I knock off another project or two on my list.

Failing to succeed

First week of blogging and I've already missed two days. Good thing this isn't a job or I'd be fired, right? 

Ah, well. Yesterday was spent in a mad dash of cleaning to prepare for having people over last night. I'm not a very good housekeeper and, though this is technically a bad habit, I'm not going to rectify it. Sure, I'll try to improve individual issues, such as laundry, but on the whole? No. 

The very second we can afford it, we're hiring a cleaning service. I don't like cleaning, I don't want to clean, and I don't see how becoming a better cleaner would improve me in any way. Plus, we (husband and I) like our free time, and it's worth it to us to essentially buy more free time by paying someone else to do a job they are good at.

But enough of that. This little project has forced me to think about my bad habits, and one that I do want to address is my inability to complete projects. Here's my pattern: I start something, I get 95% done, at which point I freak out a bit because maybe I'm worried it won't turn out "right" or maybe I see that it definitely isn't what I'd planned, and so I step away for a moment to assess with the intention of returning once I've figured out how to fix it.

Of course, I almost never get back to it. Things I've walked away from recently: a dress I made that only needs the hem done, but I don't like how the sleeves look; a bulletin board which I want to cover in fabric but can't pick one; a very easy wall decor item ready to be installed, but I can't decide on the best method to do so; ebay listings for which I've prepared the items and written descriptions, but need to take photos; a pillow which is ready to be finished but I can't decide on trim; and the list goes ON AND ON.

Today I'm going to pick a couple of these things and just finish them, damn the consequences. The reason this became a bad habit is that I'm uncomfortable with unknown outcomes; they make me nervous. Theoretically, I know it's ok to "fail", which is my word for something that isn't perfect, but actually allowing myself to fail? Hard. I need to take more risks and be less hesitant, and this habit seems like a good place to start.